What is it Like Being a Woman in Menswear?

I don’t really think I’ll ever hear the end of this question, and to be quite honest I don’t think I’ll ever be satisfied with my answer. There’s so much gravity to these few words that it’s difficult for me to actually wrap my head around truly what it is like to be a woman in menswear; however, I do have a few thoughts and I’ll try my best to articulate them.

First and foremost, I want to emphasize that I have a very unstable relationship with considering myself fully a woman. I’ve struggled to identify myself for a long time in terms of gender and I’ve pretty much come to the current conclusion that if I had to put a label on myself it would be nonbinary. Still, I ultimately prefer to consider myself as “just me.” “Just me” does come with some twists and turns, though, in terms of my lived experiences. I am a pretty masculine-presenting person and the way I look significantly affects how people interact with and perceive me. There are dozens of experiences that I’ve had—both industry-specific and not—that a feminine woman likely wouldn’t and vice versa. Where I do identify with womanhood is in my experiences growing up as a more feminine-presenting person. These two blocks of my life—the masculine-presenting part and the feminine-presenting part—culminate in me falling into a weird place when it comes to working in a male-dominated field.

The way I like to simplify how I’m viewed by some men in the industry and broader enthusiast community is this: I’m not man enough to be 100% a bro but I’m not woman enough to be “desirable,” so I’m often subject to a lot of “locker room talk” while also being left out of the boys’ club. This isn’t a unique experience and certainly isn’t menswear-specific, but it is a solid part of what it’s like to be a non-cis man in this sphere. Speaking of “locker room talk,” those conversations do in fact happen and, if you’re a feminine woman in menswear, there’s a good chance that you’ve experienced being objectified. You’ve also probably had to make space for yourself, and by “make space” I mean you have had to announce your presence and competence when men’s competence is just assumed. You’ve likely been subjected to answering “no” to questions like “Are you someone’s girlfriend?” while attending an industry event. Or, you’ve had to push to be recognized beyond the cap of being just the best dressed woman in menswear to being the best dressed person in menswear. It’s as if you have to prove that you have a right to exist in menswear spaces as an equal when men just have to show up. To be fair, the industry and community do primarily revolve around men, but we’ve had a woman win American Menswear Designer of the Year the past two years so it’s really not a shocking concept for women to have an interest in the industry and community. There are also sexist—yes, sexist—tendencies that extend beyond the opportunities that women may or may not receive within the industry.

The boys’ club culture is pretty strong, even where it might not seem like it is. Everyone, even the most in-touch, has unconscious biases they pick up from society. The most concerning trend I’ve witnessed is the rise of very influential figures who post without self-reflection and proliferate biases rooted in misogyny. This leads to a continuation of an unconscious mentality in which only those who are already the mainstream (men) are the experts, while non-men hit a glass ceiling of existence as experts only in their own lane. A prime example of this lack of recognition and consideration for the experiences of non-men in authoritative discourse is a conversation I participated in regarding the ability to shield oneself from challenge and criticism. It is pretty easy to exist in the menswear space as a cis man wearing classic, “non-offensive” clothing and to coast through the community, industry, and general society without systemically harmful commentary resulting directly from gender identity and expression. Yes, there are the “You look like Winston Churchill” comments, but women and non-men receive that reaction and more. As a woman or non-man, you don’t have the societal recognition as a man to hide behind and you will be challenged and criticized beyond the superficial “Are you auditioning for Newsies?” commentary. I’ve been called various slurs and received pretty horrible comments both online and in real life for simply wearing the clothes that I enjoy and existing as I am—an experience that cis men will never truly have. The absence of this specific experience and more is what continues the cycle of the boys’ club echo chamber of exclusivity in menswear, continuing to privilege men’s opinions above all despite the existence and prominence of non-cis men in this sphere. The cycle spirals due to regular influxes of new enthusiasts who are exposed to and absorb these norms.

It’s not a new concept that fans of menswear seek advice from and idolize specific people or platforms that appear authoritative in their interpretations and notions of what is good or bad or trendy or flattering or bricked. A large percentage of these people are young, self-conscious, and/or impressionable, and they emulate more than just wearing grey New Balance’s with OG-107’s. There are podcasts that have bro-ified the idea of men being into fashion, and Discords and Reddit threads have built and maintained echo chambers for biases to thrive without great challenge. This kind of “chronically online” archetype has become the standard introduction to and pinnacle source of knowledge on menswear (and subsequently general life advice) for people wanting to enter the dialogue even though 9 times out of 10 it isn’t truly the best, all-things-considered resource.

Still, one of the greatest things currently about being a non-cis man in this industry and community is that the multitudes of concepts, opinions, and perspectives that have gone untapped due to a difference in lived experiences between men, women, and nonbinary people are finally entering the dialogue. We’re at a point where these new perspectives are significantly changing the way we all view menswear, as well as its accessibility. More and more campaigns for traditional menswear brands are now including women and queer models and voices. There is also a general acceptance and support among people in the broader menswear industry for these new perspectives to proliferate, and even the niche classic and trad groups are moving in the direction of branching beyond their comfort zones. I personally would love to see more women and non-cis men acting as upper-level decision-makers within the industry and authorities within enthusiast community, but I’m alright taking everything one small step at a time… for now.